We recently found out thanks to our energy supplier that you can get your cavity walls filled for nothing if you are either sick enough or old enough. Doesn’t exactly balance out the other issues that come with disability and/or old age, but welcome none the less. In fact we were expecting to pay between £200-300 for it, but I mentioned in passing the fact that the MiL lives with us to the young man who came around to ‘survey’, or more accurately drill two holes and take some measurements. He perked up and said in that case if she was over 70 we wouldn’t have to pay. He further went on to explain that certain disability allowances also qualified us for free insulation. I did wonder whether it was worth saying that as we qualified twice, they could go ahead and do the insulation and we would accept £200 in lieu of the second installation. On balance I decided against it.

So we set a mutually convenient date with a nice young lady who phoned especially for the purpose and got on with the rest of life. Cue phone call a day ago saying the company had an opportunity to fit us in earlier and could they come round. I said when? They said now. Having made the compulsory check with wife we agreed. Now there’s a strange thing about time when related to any building company or individual. Whereas time is relative, the passage of time in absolute, except in the building and related trades. So ‘now’ did not mean right at this minute, it meant some time within the next hour and a half. Of course it did. I should have realised.

In the fullness of time, van pitches up and two affable chaps decamp and  do a recce of the outside of the house to make sure the ‘survey’ wasn’t telling any porkies. Satisfied that all was as expected, they started making a few suggestions. Like all the ornaments the MiL had on her windowsill would be removed. Either by us before they started or by the vibration of their hammer drills during the process. I plumped for the first option and went in to the MiL’s room to warn her of impending noise and do the necessary removals. Having done that I decided that the ‘bit of dust’ they were likely to make in the sunroom probably constituted a danger to the furniture in there and removed that to the safety of the garage pronto.

Now we have noticed a decline in the MiL’s hearing over time and what with her various ailments she spends a fair amount of time sleeping these days. Which she managed to do throughout the two hours of drilling and whatnot. To give you some idea of what an achievement that was, all the photos mounted on the downstairs loo wall were wonky after they had finished, and that wasn’t even on an outside wall. It is true to say that there were significant vibrations. More predictably cat hid under the duvet for the duration.

Now I can’t help myself, my natural curiosity about all things building related meant I had to have a look at the filling process. Turned out to be rather boring as it happens. The most exciting bit was that the roughly 4 inch thick hose was a little transparent and reminded me for the world of one of those slides they have at water parks made out of enormous pipes. You could see some movement within the pipe, in this case what looked like shredded cotton wool having the ride of it’s life, but not make out much detail.

Suddenly it was all over and all that was left was to hoover and then wash the sunroom floor. It’s a giddy ride living in Lymington for sure. But now we will be as snug as a bug in a rug, ready for the start of summer.